"I saw that day, I lost my mind," El Mañana by Gorillaz.
So last Friday was the last of class for us in the B. Ed. TESOL course here in Macquarie University.
Two years, four semesters, done. Wow. Alhamdulillah. Wow.
Going to, entering, and exiting the classes for the last time, time went slower this week, for some reason. At the end of each class I stayed an extra minute or two, just to take it all in for the last time.
Learnt so much on campus. Struggled a lot. Sometimes eager to learn. Sometimes just plain sleepy. But always struggling.
With myself more than anything else, really. My thoughts. My half-cooked and never-executed ideas. My consequential self-loathing. My tendency to lean back and let the world happen in front of me, choosing to just take it all in, and probably, just probably, learn something. My lies I tell myself.
I've definitely changed here. People rarely stay the same in the course of two years, if I may be so bold to claim. At least people who go to university. In another country.
I'd like to think my eyes have been opened more since the start of my stay here. I'd also like to think that I've become a much more tolerant person. Also, a person who appreciates the process of knowledge-seeking more. But who am I to be so audacious to claim such things?
Now, I can't get my mind off anything other than how things are going to be like when I return to Malaysia. The Maktab in particular. I've accustomed myself with this certain way of life that I'm very confident wouldn't fly very straight back at the Maktab. I'll so totally need that re-induction (more like rehabilitation, really) week.
But I've always thrived at the Maktab. I don't know what it was about the place, but I grew leaps and bounds as a person during my two and half years there. I know that my lecturers over there had a heavy hand in making that happen. Maybe that's it.
The same could not be said about the two years I've spent here. I have changed, definitely. But have I grown? I'd like to say yes, but I just can't say.
I'll be off to travel tomorrow. I still have an exam to take care of. I still have loads of stuff to pack. I still have one last video to make, here. Or maybe two. We'll see.
I regret not writing in this blog more often. Might have helped me. God knows I needed it. Oh well, what's done is done.
May peace be upon you.
Cheers!
Sunday, November 11, 2012
Saturday, October 27, 2012
Shout Awards 2012 (Who to vote?)
"Guess he had nothing to say," Hope in the Air by Laura Marling.
So surprisingly, I've been nominated for the upcoming Shout Awards. Alhamdulillah. In this post I'm going to talk about who/what I'm going to vote for in the Awards and why. Why? Because I feel like it. Now check it!
Rockstar Award
List of nomnoms: Bunkface, Estranged, Faizal Tahir, Hujan, Love Me Butch, Monoloque.
Who I'm voting for: Hujan (no duh~)
Why: Because they revolutionized the Malaysian music scene when they first burst onto the scene. Because they're fantastic to see live. Because they have ventured into other markets as well. But most of all, because they make high quality music.
Break Out Award (Best New Act)
List of nomnoms: Diandra Arjunaidi, Go Gerila!, Kyoto Protocol, Massacre Conspiracy, Najwa, Oh! Chentaku.
Who I'm voting for: Go Gerila!
Why: Because of the bang they made when debuting as a band in Versus. Because of their originality and sense of adventure when it comes to music. Because they look poised to become a big influence in Malaysia's music scene in years to come.
Fresh TV Series Award
List of nomnoms: Betul Ke Bohong?, Friday I'm In Love, Projek Pop, Tentang Dhia, Versus - Konfrontasi Terakhir, Yuna - Bintang Di Langit.
What I'm voting for: Versus - Konfrontasi Terakhir.
Why: Because of the originality of the idea and the originality it subsequently produced. Because of the myriad of memorable acts it has staged. Because Hujan, Go Gerila! and Black & Parallax.
Wired Celebrity Award
List of nomnoms: AG Coco, Altimet, Celepets, Fatimah Abu Bakar, Sofia Jane, Yuna.
Who I'm voting for: AG Coco.
Why: Because he's the most down to earth rockstar you could hope to meet. Because of his exemplary passion and hard work. Because he doesn't forget his roots. Because he's active on all the social networking sites that matter.
Shout! Aloud Award
List of nomnoms: Faradyable, yours truly, JinnyboyTV, Matluthfi90, Popteevee, The Wknd.
Who I'm voting for because I won't vote for myself: Matluthfi90.
Why: Because his work can only be described as genius. Because he does almost everything in his videos himself. Because he talks about things that matter. Because he's hilarious. Because he deserves it the most.
-------------------------------------------------------
So to vote, you guys can click over here : http://www.shoutawards.com.my/2012/nom-listing.asp
You may vote ten times per day until the 22nd of November 2012.
May peace be upon you.
Cheers!
So surprisingly, I've been nominated for the upcoming Shout Awards. Alhamdulillah. In this post I'm going to talk about who/what I'm going to vote for in the Awards and why. Why? Because I feel like it. Now check it!
Rockstar Award
List of nomnoms: Bunkface, Estranged, Faizal Tahir, Hujan, Love Me Butch, Monoloque.
Who I'm voting for: Hujan (no duh~)
Why: Because they revolutionized the Malaysian music scene when they first burst onto the scene. Because they're fantastic to see live. Because they have ventured into other markets as well. But most of all, because they make high quality music.
Break Out Award (Best New Act)
List of nomnoms: Diandra Arjunaidi, Go Gerila!, Kyoto Protocol, Massacre Conspiracy, Najwa, Oh! Chentaku.
Who I'm voting for: Go Gerila!
Why: Because of the bang they made when debuting as a band in Versus. Because of their originality and sense of adventure when it comes to music. Because they look poised to become a big influence in Malaysia's music scene in years to come.
Fresh TV Series Award
List of nomnoms: Betul Ke Bohong?, Friday I'm In Love, Projek Pop, Tentang Dhia, Versus - Konfrontasi Terakhir, Yuna - Bintang Di Langit.
What I'm voting for: Versus - Konfrontasi Terakhir.
Why: Because of the originality of the idea and the originality it subsequently produced. Because of the myriad of memorable acts it has staged. Because Hujan, Go Gerila! and Black & Parallax.
Wired Celebrity Award
List of nomnoms: AG Coco, Altimet, Celepets, Fatimah Abu Bakar, Sofia Jane, Yuna.
Who I'm voting for: AG Coco.
Why: Because he's the most down to earth rockstar you could hope to meet. Because of his exemplary passion and hard work. Because he doesn't forget his roots. Because he's active on all the social networking sites that matter.
Shout! Aloud Award
List of nomnoms: Faradyable, yours truly, JinnyboyTV, Matluthfi90, Popteevee, The Wknd.
Who I'm voting for because I won't vote for myself: Matluthfi90.
Why: Because his work can only be described as genius. Because he does almost everything in his videos himself. Because he talks about things that matter. Because he's hilarious. Because he deserves it the most.
-------------------------------------------------------
So to vote, you guys can click over here : http://www.shoutawards.com.my/2012/nom-listing.asp
You may vote ten times per day until the 22nd of November 2012.
May peace be upon you.
Cheers!
Sunday, September 2, 2012
Moon Lamp
I look up at the moon tonight and notice it's as bright as any streetlamp. I wonder how many are looking up and noticing the same when the answer comes to me. Millions (if not billions) of people are looking at the same moon. How small we are. How small we are.
Sunday, August 12, 2012
Tears
"Kalau kau rasa terkilan," Gurindam Hutan Batu by Monoloque.
So I (not so) recently watched this video:
But then again, so has everyone else. If you're one of those hermits who hasn't, it's about these two orphaned kids (a blind child and a mute child) who decide to go on a journey to visit the mute kid's mother on Eid. Touching, truly is. Kudos to BERNAS for making it.
I cried watching the video. Really cried. Like teresak-esak.
But when I stopped crying, I thought to myself.
Why am I crying? Because I just watched a sad video.
Why was it sad? Because those children were underprivileged.
So?
Hmmm..
So it made me think of how ungrateful I was of all the little things in life such as the ability to see, the ability to speak, still having my parents.
So what are you going to do about it? Be more thankful, of course.
How?
Hmmm..
So I (not so) recently watched this video:
But then again, so has everyone else. If you're one of those hermits who hasn't, it's about these two orphaned kids (a blind child and a mute child) who decide to go on a journey to visit the mute kid's mother on Eid. Touching, truly is. Kudos to BERNAS for making it.
I cried watching the video. Really cried. Like teresak-esak.
But when I stopped crying, I thought to myself.
Why am I crying? Because I just watched a sad video.
Why was it sad? Because those children were underprivileged.
So?
Hmmm..
So it made me think of how ungrateful I was of all the little things in life such as the ability to see, the ability to speak, still having my parents.
So what are you going to do about it? Be more thankful, of course.
How?
Hmmm..
------------------------------------------------------
Allah does not charge a soul except [with that within] its capacity. It will have [the consequence of] what [good] it has gained, and it will bear [the consequence of] what [evil] it has earned. "Our Lord, do not impose blame upon us if we have forgotten or erred. Our Lord, and lay not upon us a burden like that which You laid upon those before us. Our Lord, and burden us not with that which we have no ability to bear. And pardon us; and forgive us; and have mercy upon us. You are our protector, so give us victory over the disbelieving people." - Surah al-Baqarah [2:286]
Those kids are strong. They are able to cope with their fate. My fate is this. To live a life that's comfortable, more comfortable than some people will ever experience in their lives.
What am I going to do with this comfort that has been granted to me? Am I going to just dwell in the fact that I am too weak to face a fate such as theirs? Put my head down and do nothing?
What do you think?
May peace be upon you.
Cheers!
Tuesday, July 31, 2012
I am Man?
"Walaupun sejengkal," Keroncong Untuk Ana 2012 by AG & Co feat Noh Hujan.
So it was my birthday a few days back. I am apparently 22 years old, if you subscribe to the Gregorian calendar. I have very little idea of how old I am according to the Hijrah calendar, and I'm in no state to Google it.
2012 has been a year of many things, but one of the firsts would be being called a "man" by other people, particularly strangers who come to the store in which I work in. They would say to their friends or kids (or vice versa) "try asking that man over there," and I would conceal a giggle and a blush upon realising that they were referring to me. Needless to say, I took it lightly.
But now that I've turned 22, I have to ask that very serious question. Am I a man? My father got married when he was my age. Sultan Muhammad al-Fateh conquered countries when he was around my age. What do I have to show for myself? What makes me a man? Am I a man?
22 years old. So old. Yet, still so young. So much yet to do, so little to show for myself. If I've been a disappointment to anyone, it would be to myself more than anyone else.
But what does one do when one is down? What one can do. Get up. Crawl, if one has to. One needs to. For themselves. For the love of God.
May peace be upon you.
Cheers!
So it was my birthday a few days back. I am apparently 22 years old, if you subscribe to the Gregorian calendar. I have very little idea of how old I am according to the Hijrah calendar, and I'm in no state to Google it.
2012 has been a year of many things, but one of the firsts would be being called a "man" by other people, particularly strangers who come to the store in which I work in. They would say to their friends or kids (or vice versa) "try asking that man over there," and I would conceal a giggle and a blush upon realising that they were referring to me. Needless to say, I took it lightly.
But now that I've turned 22, I have to ask that very serious question. Am I a man? My father got married when he was my age. Sultan Muhammad al-Fateh conquered countries when he was around my age. What do I have to show for myself? What makes me a man? Am I a man?
22 years old. So old. Yet, still so young. So much yet to do, so little to show for myself. If I've been a disappointment to anyone, it would be to myself more than anyone else.
But what does one do when one is down? What one can do. Get up. Crawl, if one has to. One needs to. For themselves. For the love of God.
May peace be upon you.
Cheers!
Friday, July 13, 2012
Last NCG for Me
"But that's okay," That Green Gentleman (Things Have Changed) by Panic at the Disco.
So I'm back home in Marsfield. I've been home for more than a day now, arriving in Sydney yesterday evening.
The final results for the NCG 2012 (Queensland) rugby competition is as follows:
1. Victoria
2. Queensland
3. New South Wales (my team)
4. Western Australia
5. Tasmania
We dropped a place from last year, effectively ending my brief participation in the National Conference Games in a negative gradient, result-wise.
As for performance, I managed to play all four games this time round, which is a big improvement from last year's one and a half, alhamdulillah. Our scrum-half got injured in the third game, so I had to fill in that role, since the team was short on good scrum-halves. I miss being a scrum-half. Scrum-halves see so much more action than standoffs do.
Even though we ended up dropping a place from last year, I feel that this year's team was actually better than last year's. This was because the training was better, the playing was more organized (not perfect, but better than last year's, in my humble opinion), and the boys worked really hard on the pitch. We won the first two games (WA & Tas) but due to spills in the rucks in the opponents' twenty-twos, we lost the other two games (Vic & Qld). They were very efficient in capitalising on our rare moments of sloppiness, and we paid the price.
Having said all that, of course I am to a certain extent saddened by our losses, but I am certainly happy I got to play four full matches with a good team. Alhamdulillah.
My whole body is still hurting.
God I missed rugby.
May peace be upon you.
Cheers!
So I'm back home in Marsfield. I've been home for more than a day now, arriving in Sydney yesterday evening.
The final results for the NCG 2012 (Queensland) rugby competition is as follows:
1. Victoria
2. Queensland
3. New South Wales (my team)
4. Western Australia
5. Tasmania
Le spoils.
As for performance, I managed to play all four games this time round, which is a big improvement from last year's one and a half, alhamdulillah. Our scrum-half got injured in the third game, so I had to fill in that role, since the team was short on good scrum-halves. I miss being a scrum-half. Scrum-halves see so much more action than standoffs do.
Even though we ended up dropping a place from last year, I feel that this year's team was actually better than last year's. This was because the training was better, the playing was more organized (not perfect, but better than last year's, in my humble opinion), and the boys worked really hard on the pitch. We won the first two games (WA & Tas) but due to spills in the rucks in the opponents' twenty-twos, we lost the other two games (Vic & Qld). They were very efficient in capitalising on our rare moments of sloppiness, and we paid the price.
Having said all that, of course I am to a certain extent saddened by our losses, but I am certainly happy I got to play four full matches with a good team. Alhamdulillah.
My whole body is still hurting.
God I missed rugby.
May peace be upon you.
Cheers!
Tuesday, July 10, 2012
First Day of NCG2012
"It is not your fault should you lose. It is your fault should you not give your very best."
So I'm here at Bond University, Goldcoast watching the handball competition. The picture is of a guy attempting a shot at goal in midair. It was shot with the phone camera, so please forgive the less the optimal picture quality.
It's the first day of NCG 2012, and I've been the spectator to four sports now, namely football, basketball, netball and handball. After not being in sport for so long, I have rediscovered why sports is so important to me. It teaches me a lot of things, but the most valuable lesson, in my humble opinion, is the quote that I started the post with.
It's never about winning or losing, because that's pretty much predetermined by the Planner of Plans. It has everything to do with the effort we put into our game. The preperation, the training, the communication, the performance, that's all left for us to do. It is our responsibility to give it our all, however much or little that may be. And leave the rest to Allah.
May peace be upon you.
Cheers!
So I'm here at Bond University, Goldcoast watching the handball competition. The picture is of a guy attempting a shot at goal in midair. It was shot with the phone camera, so please forgive the less the optimal picture quality.
It's the first day of NCG 2012, and I've been the spectator to four sports now, namely football, basketball, netball and handball. After not being in sport for so long, I have rediscovered why sports is so important to me. It teaches me a lot of things, but the most valuable lesson, in my humble opinion, is the quote that I started the post with.
It's never about winning or losing, because that's pretty much predetermined by the Planner of Plans. It has everything to do with the effort we put into our game. The preperation, the training, the communication, the performance, that's all left for us to do. It is our responsibility to give it our all, however much or little that may be. And leave the rest to Allah.
May peace be upon you.
Cheers!
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